I see the people in the tabloids, the ones that get bad press, who have kind of gone off the edge, and I try to study them so that I don’t do that. It seems like they lost focus at some point – that’s the one thing they all have in common. -Cory Monteith
Talking to our kids about the death of Cory Monteith’s overdose is hard, as, for most kids, it will be the first actor that they have connected to, that has died from an overdose. Although Cory died at the age of 31, his character was only a teen. GLEE connected to so many and is a family favorite in our family in which we all watch together.
When the news of his death came, like everyone else that knew his work, I was deeply saddened. My family has watched Glee since the very first episode and actually knew of it, before it premiered. A good friend and neighbor was working on the show, and he told us about it. He invited my daughter studying film at a local University to come work on the set… The field in the opening scene in the very first show.
Ali came home that day so excited for the brand new actors and their exciting future. Not yet famous, all were super sweet and friendly, including Cory. Ali went on to be an extra (high school student) a few more times, and each time commented the closeness of the cast and crew.
We attended the premiere held at Santa Monica High School, and by the end of the very first episode, we were all cheering and Believing! The premiere was followed by a Q&A with the creators and the delightful young actors. They were all so excited to be there and shared memories of their auditions. Cory, like the rest, looked like a fresh-faced 15-year-old. He was, however, a 25-26-year-old man at the time. GLEE was going to be big, and it was exciting to know so many careers would be launched because of it!
Cory did not keep it a secret about his hard life and upbringing in Canada. Although he did not go into specifics or all the reasons why he attended 16 schools before dropping out at 16. Let that sink in… 16! Some of the schools he attended were for wayward teens. He began his downward spiral into the world of drugs at 12 or 13. For kids with disruptive family lives, this is when it tends to start, and without immediate intervention rarely just stops. Kids saw the character that portrayed the big man on campus as the football quarterback who comes in to save the glee club. His character was so likable; it would make sense for a young fan to see him, as they seem him on TV. Looking at the fresh face all American boy persona that was Finn, one would never suspect that Cory Monteith suffered the way he did in real life. I mean, the actors were catapulted to fame, thanks to the success of GLEE. But that was the first year. As time went on and ratings went up and down, it was hard for GLEE to find its audience the way they did that first season or two. Not to mention the long break between seasons. Something we as viewers expect on cable, but not on network television. What was the seasonal down time like for someone like Cory? Living in a country not his own, without family. They said he stayed clean in L.A. His drug demons lived in Canada.
In my house, my number 1 GLEE fan is about to turn 16. She was devastated by Cory’s untimely death, and I imagine a bit angry. Angry in that … DRUGS! Are you kidding me? WHY? And it is then I go into mom mode, and explain.
We have to talk openly about the facts, no matter how uncomfortable we may be.
Cory Monteith was a broken soul, and we need to start there with drug addiction and to talk to our kids. Every drug addict was once somebodies little kid. There is no such thing as an “accidental” overdose when it comes to heroin. According to many sites devoted to narcotics abuse, it is well known that mixing heroin with alcohol is basically Russian roulette. The user wants to die but hopes they don’t. They gamble with the devil. The mixture of both shuts down your respiratory system, and while for some, it is just a moment, for others it is death. This was Cory. Become a heroin addict, and without intense rehabilitation, eventually you will die. Plain and simple. No way around it.
We as viewers looking from the outside in, to his life, can’t know the actual demons that sat with him that night he chose to dance with the heroin devil. All we know for sure is that he had a horrible childhood. This, by his own words. I believe he shared this with the public so hopefully spare others from the same. He was open with kids and encouraged them to work hard and to get an education. He dropped out of school forever at sixteen. Did he feel inferior to his peers? Who knows? By all counts, he was kind and loveable. He cared about people.
He entered rehab months ago, but as I recall it was glossed over, as no big deal. It turns out; it was a HUGE deal. He was suffering and needed much more time than a month. He thanked everyone for their support during that period, but it is clear now that his demons were bigger than we as GLEE fans could know.
Ryan Murphy knew. He tried to help him. Others on the set knew. They sought to help. As we know now, no one could help. Can you imagine going home to Canada as a star, and your friends are not the same as the crowd you have in Los Angeles? Possibly friends that you have “partied” with before? Just an assumption on my part, but what kind of friends go out drinking with you when they knew just months ago, you were in rehab? Everyone knows a dealer’s favorite customer is the one that is not only rich but newly sober. Someone had to supply the heroin. What was the pressure placed upon a once poor kid, now successful thirty-one year old man, to help others? How many expected a handout? Sometimes, going home is the worst place to be for an addict. Did he wish to go back stateside to his GLEE “family,” or did he want to die in Canada? We will never know. And sadly, that fresh-faced actor known as “Finn” will go down in history as the guy that died from a heroin overdose. The first celebrity, my teenagers will remember forever. My prayer is that this broken soul was raised up on the wings of Eagles to perform in heaven, wholly restored and happy.
Open up the conversation at dinner tonight. Ask your kids what they think.
Cory wanted desperately to save kids from the same life he lived.